Saturday, August 21, 2010

Shrinking

So....its the middle of the night...pre-week of the exam that should be so important to my future or said so by tar ppls...the least thing i need and wanted to do would be doing lame blogging but here i am mumbling to the internet....
Inception,genting,scam...could u relate this few things into 1?i might...or i had...
moving to kl is 1 big step to me...however...it seems to be dragging me to another dimension..well...for sure not 3d...
went to genting with roommate,housemate,schoolmate or rather the penangnites...i enjoyed the fun..but is it wat i needed..
do i have a problem?my personality,my socialization,my studies,my everything seems to be huge probs for me..
other than the housemates of mine or the penangnite yungyang...i seems to have very less frens in this world that needs fake smiles n etc..do i missed penang..the island may be lesser..the ppl there seems to be the main factor..everytime i went back for a short break..i actually felt relax and delighted..
the frens that i can really smile with my true heart...no offense to my classmates...it is a hard time for me to bend with u all...even penang branch mates...we were less closer n with the current situation,things never gets better...i had my 1st scam of my life...it breaks my heart not of the money but the faces of the ppl..
they are better actors than leonardo dicaprio as they could really makes u feel the cold afteru had knew they make a big act on u just to get your money..
i've always a jerk...never changed..easy temper always make ppl afraid of me..
i hate ppl for slow and dragging decisions..i dislike ppl keep on telling ppl how they are so good or best at..
i discriminate ppl that have bad personalities..but hey..im the exact same person..so open up ur arms n tolerate..but i never listen to my own advises...
exam is near the corner..but as usual..i never learn the lesson..i still keep on dreamin and doing exactly things that are not related to my studies..
i m still the person i am from secondary school huh...
look at those frens studying oversea..those same college with mine..but look at them..they have matured..they are capable to compete in this society..but me..still the little rabbit waiting to be roasted..my secondary frens had seems to had became different persons...have their targets set..doing their dreams..but me..
wat i wanted always is the thing that every1 had...a ppl who is in a relationship with...not just those plays...but a true long term relationship..a stable income..a study that i m dedicated to..
but as u expected...none of the above had achieved by me...none...n i cant blame anyone for it.
i had have a long time to have new frens to chat..especially girls...
but i always would overthink too much things..n how the hell actually does those ppl have super duper many girl's fren? i never knew i wouldnt knew...classy girls r always out of my league..others..no idea..
the night will continue and exam will come...
girls will have good guys to be with n my frens will all succeed... 

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